Cruising . . .

My Sweetie and I are planning a little cruise vacation -- our first.  It's going to be a shortie -- with two days at sea and two days visiting Nassau and Key West.  I know, I know.  You're either going to say, "What took you so long?" or "Are you crazy?"  I'm both excited and nervous.  Will we get sea sick?  Will we get crowd sick?  Will we get sick because we're eating mediocre food twelve times a day? (Hopefully, we'll be able to operate with some level of gastrointestinal rationality!) 

We've heard all sorts of warnings and must-dos, of course, from "Go ashore every chance you get to save your equilibrium" to "Book the special ship restaurant four months early to save your stomach linings." 

So, I ask you, what do we need to know?  What should we do?  What shouldn't we do?  What do you wish you knew before you went on your first cruise?  Will you every cruise again?  Will you ever talk to me again now that you know my future vacay plans? 

And, perhaps, most importantly, what the heck should we pack so we don't freeze, broil or die of embarrassment? 

Thanks for your feedback, your advice, your warnings . . .